Second Airplane Dialogue

This is the second conversation I had on the flight between Denver and Houston...

The Image Consultant

There was some bad weather in Houston and, due to the overflow of passengers from delayed flights, our flight was full. One particular guy was especially upset at not getting his first class seat, booked for the original flight. He wound up sitting next to me. After he'd had about 30 minutes to stew over the injustice of having to sit in coach class, he seemed to calm down. I noticed, as I often do, what type of watch he was wearing (it's a weakness of mine). Panerai Luminor Marina. I comment on how nice his watch is because, at a little over $4k, it really is quite nice. In fact, he had the full metrosexual uniform going on, as if the entire Kenneth Cole Fall line just sat down next to me. I make no judgements on that, by the way. Turns out he's an image consultant that works with politician and pseudo-celebrity types.

He notices that I'm reading a copy of Machiavelli's The Prince and we talk about whether it is better to be loved than feared, or the reverse:

Me: So, I'm reading here in this book about being loved versus being feared...or respected. How do you advise your clients on this question?

Consultant: I almost always advise them to work towards being respected. The effort it takes to be "loved" is enormous. People love you when they believe that you love them back. That means you have to care about their sh**. Plus, it leaves your sh** open for them to see.

Me: And I guess that's a bad thing...

Consultant: Look, in the real world, what matters is perception. Ideally, we all would like to believe that who we really are is attractive to others and will help us get ahead. We both know that's not true, at least for most people. My job is to help people show off their positive sides and hold back their negative. It's not about putting on false fronts, like some people think. It's about simply managing what parts of you people see. We do it naturally, but I help them do it better. So, yeah, I almost always advise clients to work towards respect, not love.

Me: You said "almost always". When would you advise love?

Consultant: When it comes to your spouse...there's no amount of image management that can save you there!

Heh. At least the last statement was funny. That guy was a pretty cynical dude. But I don't fault him for his perspective because he articulated, honestly, how I usually tend to operate with people. I manage my image. I put my best qualities on display, hoping that all will see what a great guy I am. I keep others at arms length away...close enough to see those "positives" and be slightly impressed, but not too close. Any closer and it would mean that they see everything else, too. I just don't like people seeing my junk. If I were to ask Jesus the same question, I wonder what He'd say? Originally, I planned on finishing this off with a WWJD moment, but I think I'll write about that next time.